it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize