So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
