everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
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