Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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