If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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