No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
