Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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