im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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