whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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