You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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