Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize