we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
