what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I don't deserve a penis
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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