He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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