Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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