maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I am available for nakedness
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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