I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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