oh god the rape fog is back!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize