Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
