dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize