we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize