I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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