Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
