You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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