I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
It was confusing and full of hummus
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
