Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
