He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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