Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
