birth control should be required to get into college
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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