Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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