At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
