What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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