Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
