i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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