I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Randomize
