Only a mothe r could love this liver
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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