3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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