Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
