we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
