Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
He is an equal opportunity slut.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
they're like a gay fantastic four
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize