rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
