how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
