Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
