i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
