either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
