If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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