Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
i came on her dog
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
