god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize