waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize