I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
